Yes, No, Maybe

A simple safety tool to facilitate freedom, friendship & fun.

To use Yes, No, Maybe, take a piece of paper and write Yes, No and Maybe as headings, then work through each space in order, writing entries under the appropriate heading.

Yes

Yes is a space to reinforce caring, responsible, fun pay;

• Yes, we are playing a game together. Play works best in safe spaces.
• Yes, we are here to have fun together! We can’t all being having fun if one of us isn’t feeling safe, so safety is everyone’s responsibility.
• Yes, we will respect each others preferred pronouns, names, identities.
• Yes, we will respect Yes, Nos and Maybes.

It’s also a good opportunity for the Players (and GM if there is one) to talk about what they would like to say Yes to in the game, topics/themes/ideas they hope will come up.

It can be a space to explore Yes, and start our transition to Nos and Maybes.

Work round the group, giving everyone a chance to contribute as many Yes entries as they want, writing them on the sheet.

No

No is a space to allow things to be consciously, carefully, unashamedly avoided.

• No, we don’t want anyone else to be hurt by topics that make them feel uncomfortable.
• No, there is no topic too important to be a No; anything can be a No.
• No, we don’t need anyone to explain any of their Nos.

Once again, work around the group, giving everyone a chance to contribute as many No entries as they want.

People may wish to say “We would like this to be a No” rather than “I would like…”, since that makes discussing the issue less personal, and (rightly) assumes the group will agree to avoid the topic.

Some may wish not to speak but simply write down their Nos.

Some groups may wish to anonymously pass the sheet round, and agree any new Nos that appear, without attempting to identify the author.

Maybe

Maybe is a space to allow safe exploration of grey area and for proposing growth or reduction of scope.

Work around the group, allowing everyone to add a Maybe.

Often a Maybe will reveal a hidden Yes or No, in which case add those to the sheet also. An example of a Maybe entering a discussion is below.

Jama: So, as one more Yes, I’m really hoping we can touch on themes of village life and farming? Everyone happy with that?

Sev: Yes, sounds lovely. Can I add a Maybe?

Jama: Sure, go ahead!

Sev: I’d prefer we steer clear of animal cruelty. I’m fine with animals on the farm, I just don’t want to discuss meat production and similar.

Jama: Oh definitely. So really it’s a Yes for Farms, and a Yes for Animals on Farms? As long as we can maintain a No for Harm to Animals?

Sev: Yes, exactly. Brilliant!

Order of the tool

The order in this tool is intentionally Yes, then No, then Maybe, because I find starting with a positive approach helpful and easier to talk about.

Personally, I feel that if I can contribute a Yes and join the conversation, then offering a No afterwards is less daunting. Some people may prefer to run in an order of No, Maybe, Yes, and that’s fine too. 

Ultimately it is just a tool aimed at facilitation healthy communication. If the communication works, it doesn’t matter what shape the tool ends up in!

About the Author and licence

Yes, No Maybe was written by CM Lowry.

• Find their work at cmlowryauthor.itch.io.
• Find more about safety tools at https://allaboutchris.org/rpgsafety

Yes No Maybe is available for anyone to use for free with a CC BY Creative Commons Licence - (Feel to use and change it, just please give attribution to CM Lowry).